No, not that lame, but last year was just plain damn effed up (sorry)
You know how you go to do something that requires focus, but you just can’t get there? Too many thoughts racing around in circles. I go upstairs to get my phone, then the dogs want to play, oh here’s this to do, this to put away, this to paint, this to repair. Head back downstairs. No phone. Start all over.
2021 was just plain crappy. That’s a fish, but I think that’s spelled crappie..
I think I mentioned previously about my brother Rick dying in January. And see …there goes my focus.
After Rick’s passing, my health slowly spiraled. Covid continued to throw a dark cloud over the planet.
And then the world collapsed on July 7, 2021. That’s when I asked them to stop life support for my Mother, Mom. Joan Kathleen Percy. And they discontinued the oxygen, took off the tubes and all the other stuff. And she lived 35 more minutes, then no longer existed. Is becomes was.
It killed a major part of me, on top what I had just lost.
see, now the tears will start, and with my focus gone completely, I’ll set this iPad down and have Lucy come sit by my side and give me lovin’. That’s my little puppy who purrs loud and happy if you rub her belly.
but I’m still drawn to my boyhood home in the middle of nowhere, called Kansas.
The sadness is kind of crushing, I guess that describes it.
I’m a very lucky man to have another woman in my life, who for some unknown reason decided some 27 years ago to fall in love, just as I did.
She has held me together, taken care of everything, while I contemplate my navel lost in thoughts and memories.
I’m more than cared for.
Mom made my wife promise to take care and love me as she does. And she has seen to my survival with love and caring and compassion
But I miss Mom dearly. Crushed and grieving
My brother Ricks untimely death broke her heart, and at 92 she let go…but in command all the time. Driving the “old people” to the mall. Then she came home, felt horrible, went to the hospital and passed away five days later.
But don’t mourn, she had the most wonder life, not easy, and not always roses, but just wonderful in the way she radiated with love, and everyone was engulfed by it. Ask anyone, and they’ll confirm my sentiments. Making the world a far better place.
There, that wasn’t too hard, a box of Kleenex is cheap
I gotta hit the publish button and turn back to walking the path, start living.
We all do, we’ve been beaten down by Covid and you survived. There are millions of people not as lucky, but the rest of us need to get back to living.
Apologies for any errors, lost or meaningless words in there, bit I can’t re-read this